There's Something Wrong in Morrington County by Ryan W Kinney

Author:Ryan W Kinney
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Ryan W. Kinney

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Albie’s phone chimed. “Hold up,” she interrupted Ro with her index finger pointed upward, checking that Malia was okay.

All was well, so she set her phone aside. They were still on the couch, talking low enough not to be overheard by Ro’s presumably slumbering lover.

“Wayne called it a ‘wicking stone,’ and it wicked the fat away when I ran it across my thighs. And I am not about to mess this up; I’m keeping it off. That’s why I’ve been juicing. This one’s kale, limes, apples, and coconut are great for cutting fat. Do you like it?” Ro said with another swig.

“Ro, I love you, but La Croix’s taste better than this. But the stone, where is it now?” Albie asked.

“I buried it away from the house; that’s what Wayne’s fine ass told me to do. You should’ve seen Futts’ face—he was the first to see me after. He wanted to compliment me so badly, but I think he didn’t wanna seem gay,” Ro laughed.

“Futts?” Albie asked.

“Yeah, you know, my neighbor,” Ro told her.

“The White guy who keeps reminding me that he voted for Obama?” Albie asked.

“Yeah, that’s him,” Ro chuckled.

“Ro, are you being for real? Because, right now, it’s sounding like you just don’t want to give me your surgeon’s info,” Albie said.

“I’m serious! Albie, come on. How else could I look this good with no scars? I’m telling you, this is real,” Ro reassured her.

Albie traced the rim of her glass. “Ok, I believe you. Why is your life messy?” she asked.

“Because I’m like chili, baby: I might be messy, but I’m spicy too,” he fired back with an imaginary hair flip.

“Chili’s also cheap and gives you the shits but do you, boo,” she snapped back.

A tight and short golden-complexioned man wearing only boxers strutted out of Ro’s boudoir.

“My bad, I didn’t know anyone was here. Zeek,” he introduced himself with a wave.

“Hi, I’m Albie; nice to meet you. Ro?” she said and walked towards the front door.

Albie and Ro left Zeek rummaging in the fridge. Outside, the night sky kissed the shadowy forest opposite the double-laned country road in front of Ro’s house.

“Bitch, you booked Zeek? Tell me everything!” Albie exclaimed.

“You couldn’t wait until he left?” Ro laughed.

“Hell no, spill!” she said.

“I mean, there isn’t much to say! I ran into him out front the Fireplace—you know that bar I took you to last pride. Anyway, I was feeling my oats and…finally asked him, ‘what’s up with us?’” he said, and she squealed.

“Yes! And I was looking good!” he said with a fake hair flip.

“Coochie cutters?” she asked.

“Coochie cut all the way off! My itty bitty needed a metal lung by the time I got home. Thank the Lord that Zeek was there to help resuscitate!” Ro said, and it sent them into a screaming fit of laughter.

The bushes rustled loudly, and they stopped laughing. It turned out to be a Santa-like fellow in athleisure.

“Futts, oh my God. I thought it was a raccoon or something,” Ro sighed in relief.

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